Simply Renovated

Over a year ago I was emailing my brother back and forth and we were talking about prayer requests.  I told him this, "I don't know what is going on but I feel like God is doing something big in my heart and I don't know what and I'm kind of scared to find out".  He prayed for me. 

Interestingly enough, not long after (few months maybe) my brother says something to me about pre-destination that I didn't agree with and was offended by.  The thoughts of "this isn't the God I've known my whole life" literally went through my head.  I was confused...emailing and talking to people who were firm in the Bible.  They basically threw scripture at me and wanted or encouraged me to figure it out on my own (which I wouldn't have it any other way).   This was a long road of mixed emotions, crying, reading and praying.  

I am no theologian and I know there can be a million different angles to one topic in the Bible but I ended on this verse and again it came to me last night during a bible study.

2 Peter 3:9

"The Lord is not slow in keeping his promise, as some understand slowness.  He is patient with you, not wanting anyone to perish, but everyone to come to repentance."

This is in the Word of God so I know it's true, but there are also verses talking about pre-destination and the fact that there will be some that absolutely do not accept God.  There will be many that claim to accept Him but never really do.  This was it.  This is what God was working out in me.  My faith. What I believe and if I truly believe it.  I call it my "baptist box".  God has been pulling me out of it and helping me truly unveil what faith is...not what I have to do.  

It hasn't been fun though.  Because really digging into the Word and changing your heart and your life makes you a minority.  You get scoffed at.  I was getting angry at myself for not understanding the "progessive" ways.  I was wondering if I was wrong.  Thank God for the Holy Spirit and the stirring inside me that nudged me to continue to walk in sync with the Word.  My bible study last night encouraged me to prepare myself to be scoffed at.  For even other believers to think of me as uneducated and unsophisticated .  To laugh at me to think that God's Word actually applies to my life today.  But here is the key.  God has NEVER been proven wrong.  He has NEVER failed on a promise so I can rest assured that although I may be scoffed at, laughed at, ridiculed and called names...I need not worry about being wrong, or caving because God will prove it once again...sooner or later...I must press on to have that present-active-participle faith like Noah, Abraham, Enoch, Abel, Isaac, Jacob, Joseph, Moses, Rahab, Gideon, Barak, Samson, Jephthah, David and Samuel.  I need not put it off until tomorrow...