...my life word...

Have you ever heard of a life word?  A word that you choose to focus your life on...well I try and do one every year.  So this year...I still haven't quite figured it out.  

I try and look back at 2013 and honestly? I didn't cry enough. Wait...what? Yes, I honestly did cry enough.  This may seem weird to you but as much as I don't like to cry ... there is a peace that comes after the cry.  I am not saying I want disaster brought to my life, but I definitely want my heart to break for what breaks Gods and I can honestly say, this past year I lived a little blindly. I overwhelmed myself with a schedule in photography that I never want to return to.  It made me "not present", always worrying about the next session, how much I have to do and how much time it is away from my family.  I "checked out" and it was not good. 

There were some big decisions made, a relationship that I loved changed for what seems like forever.  But then there were relationships built that I hope last forever.  A marriage challenged and a challenged conquered.  

In my opinion you have two options.  Two ways to live your life. You can choose to live life viewing it as a gift or as a given. You can choose to live life drowning yourself in thanksgiving or you can choose to live life drowning because you take everything for granted.  When I choose to see life as a gift and everything in it as a gift...I am happier.  Because I don't just see it as a gift...I see the Giver in each and every little gift.  

We are in a hurting world.  A world where we honestly need training in to survive.  I have a friend whose husband hurts her, kicks her out of her home with kids and doesn't show he loves her.  What about the friend whose husband lies to her and cheats on her? I have a friend who lost two babies within 24 hours.  I have a friend who has been on a very long journey of ups and downs in her life.  I have a grandma...forgetting. A step-mother whose daughters won't talk to her.  These are hard things.  But if we cannot choose to open our hands, bow our hearts and see that there is a Giver in all of these things...then we drown.  We must see God in these things...in the good and the bad. 

There is an enemy prowling and he has to desires for a Christian walking in faith: 1. blind you to who God is. 2. and blind you to who you are

(ann voskamp)

So what is my life word this year? 

Well if I am choosing to count the gifts, choosing to see God in all things...

see

that's it...

I will choose to see God in everything...good and bad.  It won't be easy but it's my choice.  To see where every gift is from the Giver.